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This isn't a blank post. Would I do this to you?

I have gone a week without you.
I am very proud of myself.
I guess I could last a few more days
'til you come back home.

She asked me to go have pizza with strangers.
Not strangers to her, of course.
But strangers to me.
I watched as they all hurried past my desk,
eager for a greasy slice of meat-covered dough.
18 pizzas, 60 strangers, satisfied greed.
Caskets of wine, packs of beer,
fat men drinking to their hearts' (and bellies') content.
The sound of laughter and voices worn out by the long day,
the clanking of glass bottles as they toast to the end of another week,
the giggling of the middle-aged females looking to get some
before they wither away into their own wrinkles.
I don't belong here with these nonsensical corporate clones.
I will not have pizza with your strangers.

Sweep away these shattered fragments;
the remains of my poor, poor heart.
Cast them away, out into the deep sea
where they can dissolve and fade into the cool salty breeze.
Forget. Hide these memories in the long-unattended corner
at the back of your mind,
until they disappear completely.

© Copyright Victoria Teo, 2010 and onwards.

styrofoam plates, cafeteria tables.

I really fucked it up this time.

Yes, the rumours are true. I'm in love with you.
It was never anyone else. It was always you.
Right from the beginning,
when I was talking about "some guy",
you never realised that that "some guy" was you.
I'm sorry.

Please excuse me, I'm not thinking clear.

So once upon a time, there was this girl.
So once upon a time, there was this girl who wanted this guy.
So once upon a time, there was this girl who wanted this guy who didn't want her.
So once upon a time, there was this girl who chased after nothing and got nothing in return.
That girl was me.